Friday, May 8, 2009

..>> wasteland <<..

i figured if i blog first thing, or as soon as think of a particular good bloggy subject, i'd be more inclined to conintue blogging.
i'm still very unsatisfied with my living space. over the past couple months i've taken it upon myself to (try to atleast) transform my house. i stripped the outside of it's shitty/chippy whitish grey paintjob and repainted it in a lovely yellowy with white trim... which goes particularly well with the lavender flowers i have going on. but with that being said, the man i end up with needs to be down with painting skillz, as i am, in no way shape or form going thru that again haha.

so now, with thr outside looking halfway decent i'm trying to battle the innards. re-doing the dinning room and spare living are was the first port of call, and although it looks heaps better, i am still more than disatisfied with it :/ this house is very open plan, but lends itself to nothing. i don't know if the unwelcoming vibes i get from it or the fact my mother and i have comepletey contrasting personal tastes and a limited budget, but it seems no matter how hard i try it looks like shit. time to call the wahmbulance.

so i've given up on the immediate living area and am moving on to my bedroom and my bathroom... HOWEVER haha, i have way too much stuff for my bedroom to be tranquil. for all intents and purposes, it's practically like trying to stuff 5lbs of sugar into a 1lb bag. it's just no kosher... and with mike STILL having all my bestest stuff at his, wherever that might be, i refuse to get rid of anything else.

this daunts me :( but i feel as part of my new plan, i need a sanctuary, not chaos.
i would post before and after pictures, but the state both of them are in now is so uncool that i think i'll save myself the embaressment and just accept the compliments for an awesome job done when it's all completed lol.

also, i am becoming increasingly lonely. it's palpable and i hate that i feel like this. sometimes i wish i wasn't so picky and particular about men, sometimes i wish i could be casual and fleeting about it all, but alas... it's not how i'm wired.
"i'm not the kind of cat you can just pick up and throw into your lap"- ani difranco

once again, the poor quadraped i call bailey gets stuck with being my part time boyfriend. observe!!

my little cannon camera is annoying in the fact it zooms when i take close up pictures.... so even though it's at a good arms length away from me... it doesnt reflect that in photos. ack.
as you can tell, that's bailey and i being very myspace and taking bedtime cosey pictures of how happy we are. i am fairly certain he would take them if he had thumbs.
i'm such a doteing human... that also happens to wear sugarskull loungey clothes :p


mahuahua said...

oh sweetheart,loneliness is a killer:( it's an awful feeling and when you have no-one to talk it through with,it can make you feel so shitty:( i know it's not the same,i really do,but know that i care an awful lot about you.i know you want someone you can touch and share things with...chatting to people on the internet just isn't the same.but i love you loads,and know that things do pass xxxx

kittenesque said...

aww i love you too lady chops *3000 mile long hugssssss*
it is sucky, but in a way it's good.. learning about my strengths and weaknesses etc. but i would love real friends immediatly near and the weight of a man on top of me :p hehe

mahuahua said...

ooooh,of course,and he would have to be grunting all manly like.uh uh uh uhhhh.hahaha.gross.

kittenesque said...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA rofls. i geuss my murmurs would have to be pretty loud as well then hahaha.
you so naaaaasty :D