Saturday, August 29, 2009

..>> still breathing <<..

goign thru computer and internet issues along with packing and get ready for a 6 month leg in europe is stressful. i hope my ladies know i miss and lvoe them dearly. and despite not talking or being online, i think of them always and have goody baskets for them.
<3 <3

hope you're both doing so well
see you in 2 months!!!!!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

..>> h8red <<..

today the california supreme court decided to uphold prop 8, outlawing gay marriage in california. this really makes me sad. i thought we ( as a nation) were more forward thinking than this, and i'm disappointed in the supreme court for being so closed minded. everyone.. gay, straight, bisexual, transgendered, EVERYONE should have equal rights to marry who they want to. i have many gay friends and all i want is for them to be happy, yet this is just another obstacle in their way. now they must continue fighting to be granted a basic civil right that many people take for granted. shame on you, california! we must all continue to fight the h8! when you see places like iowa in favor of gay marriage... i mean, california is supposed to be THE progressive state. this really just defies all logic to me and i am so saddened and disappointed :(

Monday, May 25, 2009

..>> lollerskates <<..

this is charlotte jenkins... charlotte jenkins bullied me for a year and a half before i moved back into the private school system. charlotte jenkins used to call me the ugliest girl ever born. now, i don't mean to speak ill of my sex ( i lie... i do) but charlotte jenkins has always ALWAYS looked like this, and i have to say... she's fucking munter! there, i said it! the only reason she was even remotely popular, and even then it was just with guys, was because she was the school bike. she had more baby batter in her than a freaking spermatorium! i find great solace that a) i've slept with less men in my whole life then she has done in one night (i know this to be fact) and b) she ended up with a bloke, who is supposedly so enamored and excited to be married to her, he had to get pissed on special brew at their reception.
charlotte jenkins certainly has the life she deserves *smug*
ps, the slightly askew cheapo tiara is aprticular classy touch... don't you agree? rofl

Sunday, May 24, 2009

..>> fail <<..

nothing much to say today. my words feel stagnant anf my mind is void of everything apart from one thing that plays over and over again.
i'm having a very hard time trying to find a word to describe how i feel right now... it's not really numb, though a cold edge is forming... it's not really apathy, as i care far too much. it's weird. deflated maybe? even defeated... i think i might have fucked something up and i don't really know how to rectify or mend it, but on the other hand i'm begining to think maybe it's not mine to mend. maybe none of my words can heal this particular hero's wounds... only his and his alone will write the story he chooses to belong to... but i do not wear this silence well. i'm starting to wear it very ill indeed, and i only have myself to blame. i alone chose to be the coy and cryptic gem on this particular, lustrous necklace.

this entire situation makes me feel that i am wide awake and dreaming at the same time.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

..>> bit of a perv <<..

i sexually harass samwise when we talk.... you'd be able to tell if these pictures actually showed up in correct size :/
she acts like she doesn't like it, but she'm pervy too HAHAHAH

..>> beauty and the beast <<..

Beauty did not know why she had such a burndensome name. She had never felt beautiful and it only made it worse to have to say her name to new people and see the bemused expression in their eyes. Only the Beast did not get such a look in his eyes when Beauty’s father introduced them and then left his daughter in the castle to pay off his debt.When Beauty’s father got sick she asked the Beast if she could leave the castle to see him. The Beast drove her home on the back of his motorcyle and left her at the door with a trunk full of old, leatherbound books and a golden music box with a singing nightingale on top to keep her company. Then he rode back to his castle because as sad as the Beast was he cared more about Beauty’s peace of mind than about his desire to have her at his side every day . Although he missed Beauty and wanted to crawl into bed, or ride his motorcycle too fast or do anything to forget what he had to do, the Beast sat down and got to work on the novel he had kept in a box for twenty years because before she left him Beauty asked that he finished it for when she returned. While the Beast wrote his book, Beauty sat at her father’s side and comforted him while parts of his body were slowly removed one by one. It felt to Beauty as if parts of herself were also being removed. She never let her father see her cry. Late at night when he had finally fallen into a dazed sleep, Beauty and the Beast talked through the golden mirror. They shared what had happened to them during the day. Then Beauty would take off her dress and stand naked in the mirror so the Beast could see her shining body. They touched themselves as they stared into each other’s eyes. Then, spent, they lay down in their separate rooms and the Beast sang Beauty lullabies in his rich, strange voice until she fell asleep. When Beauty’s father finally died the Beast arrived at Beauty’s door with twelve dark red and enchanted roses from his garden. Beauty brought the Beast inside and they lay together on Beauty’s bed and Beauty wept and the roses sang an old Beatles song to her. Then Beauty and the Beast took Beauty’s father’s ashes, got onto the Beast’s motorcycle, drove up P.C.H. and scattered the ashes into the sea along the coast. The waves rose up and took the remains of Beauty’s father far away. Then Beauty and the Beast made love in a yurt by the sea. The next morning they swam in the ocean, ate fresh strawberries and got back on the motorcycle with the empty urn. They arrived back at the Beast’s castle and got in bed. The Beast read his finished story to Beauty and all the little characters came out of the book and performed on the golden stage. After the story was over Beauty thanked all the characters and then she took the Beast’s beautiful face in her hands and kissed his mouth and thanked him for finishing the tale. There were tears in her eyes and the Beast called her sweet pea and kissed them away. The Beast did not ever change into a prince. He was already a prince with a heart like a golden musicbox inside his broad chest. And Beauty? When she looked into the golden mirror she no longer saw her dying father, or even the Beast. She saw herself the way the Beast had always seen her. And she was no longer afraid of her name.

Friday, May 22, 2009

..>> hmmm <<..

i do think horoscopes are a load of tosh, but this is a bit uncanny.
Leo: There are a few things you must get out of your system before you can start again

need i say more?!