Monday, May 11, 2009

..>> sly creature <<..

a friend of my ex (mike) emailed me today. and i don't really know why he thought the fact that mike's new girlfriend was moving in with him, would be of any interest to me. i don't know why, after over 2 years of seperation he thought i would still give a damn. i don't know why this guy would even think to email me, as we never talk anymore anyway :/
i'm sitting here wondering if after all this time, mike still needs to think i give a shit... was this some kind of emotional warfare he was trying to pull thru a third party?

and truthfully, the only thing i am really bothered about are the things i left in our old apartment when i went. had i known i wouldn't be returning, i would have packed them up and shipped them out before i goton the plane that christmas eve. and i have no clue where he is now. i don't care, but it would be nice to have my things back.

  • my 2 audrey kawasaki giclee prints
  • my mark ryden 'blood' special edition book and signed numbered prints
  • my jeff soto painting, and all my other lowbrow goodies
  • books by brown, ryden, giger et al
  • and most importantly, things of my grandmothers i took with me to make our house a home. kitchen tools, hand made quilts, frames.
my heart breaks just thinking about the sentimental things that are lying around there in a box, or worse... thrown out or given to goodwill without a second thought. all my art prints and such are replaceable. they are after all, just peices of paper. but my mother gave me my grandmothers belongings. she took good care of them, as did i. and feel like such a failture that i left them there in the hands of that unappreciative idiot. i should have known better. i should have known that not everyone see's things with such sentimentality and preciusness as i.

i wish more than anything i could get them back :(
it wouldn't make me feel like less of a failure in relationships, but it would be comforting to know i still have those peices of my grandmother near by. watching me. guarding me. keeping me safe until i finally find someone to share them with, and who would apprciate them like i do.
and as for mike's new girlfriend, sucks to be her. he's going bald AND has no idea how to pronounce 'h'eure deuvres'. SO HA lol

why can't the ghosts of our past just stay buried?!

1 comment:

mahuahua said...

whoa,that friend of your ex sounds a bit of an people to bring things up when you've just gotten used to forgetting them.and that sucks that you left some of your stuff there.think of it this way darlin,if he's still got your stuff,your grandmother may be sending bad thoughts to him through them.looking after her granddaughter innit?love you xxxx